Posts Tagged intuitive eating
Leaving, On a Jet Plane …
View of Vernon from The Cliffs, part of App. Trail
There’s just something about the house you grew up in, that makes “going home” feel so special … no matter how old you are.
Not to mention, I haven’t been home since April, and haven’t seen my family since Thanksgiving (which was wonderful, but not spent at our house — so wonderful as it was, it wasn’t the same experience). My brother lives in L.A. so I won’t see him, but my sister lives in NYC and she’s coming home, too.
The moment I see the gorgeous Manhattan skyline come into view from the air, my heart usually starts to pound with excitment, knowing Newark Airport is minutes away (just like it would when we’d fly past San Salvador Volcano and jut out over the Pacific Ocean before turning back and making a landing at Comalapa Airport).
I know my parents will be waiting for me at the baggage carousel … (just like my then-boyfriend, now-husband would be waiting for me after customs)
And ok, I know the “smell” that is this part of Jersey will be greeting me, too.
People like to rip on my home state for its bevy of strip malls, wild, road-raging drivers, stand-still traffic, big-haired/attitude-y women, “guidos,” the beautiful ports of Newark/Elizabeth (a sorry first sight for many of N.J.!), and the ubiquitous Parkway and Turnpike exits from which everyone seems to live off (and The Sopranos only fueled some of those stereotypes!).
But where I’m from — about an hour from Manhattan in northern N.J., it’s rural farm-country and beautiful. My home town (Vernon) is a ski resort community — dotted with mountains and lakes galore. My high school was a 20-min. bus ride and the nearest mall/movie theater is 45 min. away. Until recently, there was only one stop-light in the whole town. But it’s home. (more…)
15 comments February 4, 2009
Internal Battle: Me vs. Me
Image credit: http://english.pravda.ru
On the one hand, I want to be “free” from the chains of dieting, which I talked about yesterday, being tenet “numero uno” of Intuitive Eating.
I know that this will be the next step toward overcoming my disordered eating habits, which have really been dwindled down in the past two months to the occasional midnight snack and the now-more-frequent chewing-and-spitting incidents.
But on the other hand, I feel like my life is in this state of limbo right now, and since I don’t have the freedom at home to prep-cook and plan and since a lot of meals are uncertain, the only thing keeping my sanity seems to be counting Points and my daily workouts.
And then making matters worse, my lovely monthly visitor arrives today, wreaking havoc on my emotions. I don’t like the person I become for two to three days each month. And now, my behavior matters even more, as I have an audience (our visitors).
I’ve been told that perhaps I am focusing too much on “me” during this time and I ought to direct my emotions toward my husband and giving him the ability to enjoy his visit with his family.
Perhaps I have been too selfish. People who know me well know I wear my heart on my sleeve; that I am a giver, generous, thoughtful … But this person I stare at in the mirror lately is full of rage, loathing, distaste…she’s ugly.
This isn’t how I want to be.
So for today, I’d like to not fight myself. I don’t want to be selfish. I don’t want to dislike the “me” I am at the moment.
And if I can’t handle breaking 100% from the dieting mentality right now, so be it. I’d rather count Points and keep up my workouts and maintain my sanity then go off the deep end because I can’t handle all the changes at once.
I’m going to give myself credit for what I am doing right now: continuing my exercise regimen, continuing to eat healthy, and not letting an uncomfortable situation turn me into a binge monster.
(OK truth be told I’ve never really had an all-out “binge” the way everyone else defines a binge, but I have snacked mindlessly all the while counting Points … and to me that out-of-control feeling of eating food I don’t need qualifies as a binge).
Bottom line: I do know that Intuitive Eating and Core are where I want to be…and I’ll get there. It might just be at my own pace.
How about you? How do you handle internal battles? What can you give yourself credit for today?
12 comments August 26, 2008
Intuitive Eating
Though I am still not through The Four-Day Win by Martha Beck, I’d been wanting to read Intuitive Eating for a long time now.
I finally bit the bullet this weekend when it became available through my library’s inter-library exchange program. (Beware: long blog entry ahead!)
Within the first few pages, I realized I am a restrictive eater, even when trying not to be.
I also realized that my “thesis” that dieting led to my disordered eating was proven, granting me a strange sense of validation. In fact, there’s even a whole chapter in this second edition book titled “Intuitive Eating: The Ultimate Path Toward Healing from Eating Disorders,” which I found compelling and timely.
Though “eating disorders” are mostly described, they do also use the expression “disordered eating” several times. And in nearly every case study they offer, it was dieting and the subsequent euphoria/confidence from it that compelled these subjects to, in time, engage in self-destructive behaviors.
I know in my heart of hearts that I didn’t have a problem with eating before dieting and finding success with Weight Watchers.
And though I can’t blame my disordered eating habits solely on food issues–I understand now that it’s a coping mechanism for anxiety–I know that I still do not have a healthy, “normal” relationship with food or exercise. (more…)
16 comments August 25, 2008
Flexing Your Resistance Muscle
Most social functions today seem to revolve around food and/or drink.
I believe there’s a time and place for everything, and it’s up to us how we choose to handle the options at these gatherings. We don’t need to embrace them or shun them, but rather find a comfortable balance among them.
Wine bars, coffee houses, and jazz clubs aren’t going to disappear. There will always be office donuts, holidays, Girl Scout cookie sales, farmers’ market samples, pizza parties, weddings and backyard BBQs to attend, Girls’ Nights Out, date nights, etc. And you can pretty much bet that someone is always going to bring in baked goods for birthdays, regardless of your age.
Yet every day doesn’t have to be a total “treat.” There will always be another party, another picnic, another carnival.
So why do we, as Americans, find the need to indulge, seemingly all day, every day?
Even if we’re not watching our weight and are truly living in the moment and really grabbing life by the horns, do we need to make every day into a food-fest, free-for-all?
Can’t we learn to have a little of this and a little of that and just enjoy it for what it is? Kind of like how the French do it? (Speaking of, I loved that book, Why French Women Don’t Get Fat)
I think if more Americans knew how to flex their “resistance muscle,” maybe that would be the case. (more…)
18 comments July 11, 2008
