Hunger is … O.K.
September 5, 2008
Last night, I had an admittedly tough night.
After therapy and a mini-workout (just 25 min. quick cardio), all the anxiety and stress I’ve been trying to conceal these past few weeks came out in an emotional blow-up with my husband.
(For those keeping tabs, we’re three weeks in, and two weeks to go of my house-guests…)
We talked for hours, and after we’d calmed down and laid both our concerns out on the table (and there were plenty, given the circumstances) and reached a point of synergy, my stomach began to rumble.
I was genuinely hungry. My eyes were puffy, and my tummy felt as empty as my aching head.
I hadn’t eaten much at dinner and had ended at 22 pts total for the day, but I also knew I didn’t need more food (20 is my target).
To sleep, my body doesn’t need extra fuel. So instead of turning to food for comfort–something I’ve done in the past, be it a fight with him, my mom, or a friend–I decided to “feel” the hunger.
To sit with it, absorb it, and let the uncomfortable feeling settle at the pit of my tummy, telling myself I won’t die if I allow myself to just feel it.
As an emotional eater, this was a big step. It’s something Beck’s book and Intuitive Eating both talk about … truly embracing the sense of hunger.
I learned last night that sometimes, hunger is truly “ok” — it doesn’t allow us to mask our emotions but rather forces us to face our demons, head-on.
Perhaps some of it is, indeed, in our heads?
How about you? When is true hunger “ok” for you? Or does hunger backfire with a binge for you?
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1.
suzanne | September 5, 2008 at 8:53 am
Normally hunger backfires into a binge eating episode for me. Although i’m trying to stop and think before that happens. I think even trying to stop is a step in the right direction even if i’m not very successful with it yet.
2.
Mandy | September 5, 2008 at 9:14 am
I love that line ‘embrace the hunger’ because I totally hear you! Sometimes you are done your points for the day and you’re hungry. That’s usually when I convince myself that if I’m hungry, I must need food and then I go over. Thank you for this… food for thought. It is ok to be hungry sometimes, no matter how much I hate it. I actually feel in control when I don’t give in to it, but that is so rare these days. Thank you.
3.
V | September 5, 2008 at 10:23 am
This is a tricky one, because I have a history of denying myself/indulging myself food (alternating) when I’m upset, and part of my journey with WW has been to try to take food out of the “emotional reaction” equation. So part of me thinks that since you were GENUINELY hungry, you could have had a glass of milk / piece of fruit / something small to take the edge off and then gone to sleep. But another part of me agrees that it’s not the end of the world to feel hunger! It’s can be strangely comforting to feel your stomach empty. And I do go to bed “hungry” quite often because I’m looking forward to breakfast and don’t want to spoil my morning hunger for it.
Anyway, this is a long way of saying that “feeling/embracing the hunger” can be a good and a bad thing: it’s not an emergency, it’s not the end of the world, but there’s no virtue in denying yourself a healthy snack when you are truly hungry, and if you do deny yourself, it might lead to a binge days or weeks down the road.
I love your blog—thank you for putting yourself out there for all of us.
4.
lissa10279 | September 5, 2008 at 11:38 am
Suzanne, it’s that Stop. Rest. Assess method; it worked last night but it doesn’t always work for me!
So true, Mandy. It feels more in control to stop or say no but sometimes when we’re having fun or sad, we just don’t “care” ya know?
Hi V! I didn’t want to eat in this particular instance because I knew I would not die overnight from not eating. I don’t always have that level of control (I usually will nibble) but it felt good to wake starving (and know I’d had a fully nutritionally sound day the day before).
My dad says I was “born hungry” and so this was a big deal for me not to eat 1) when hungry and 2) when emotionally a wreck.
5.
lissa10279 | September 5, 2008 at 11:38 am
Aw and thank you, V!!!
:) 
It’s therapy for me and for others I hope!
6.
auntie | September 5, 2008 at 2:31 pm
wow - i’m totally impressed with how you handled that situation! i have a horrible time not giving in when my stomach is rumbling. great job!!
7.
lissa10279 | September 5, 2008 at 3:00 pm
Thanks Auntie!!! I dunno, today I’ve been really hungry so I guess it all evens out in the end.
8.
Yasmin | September 7, 2008 at 6:49 pm
Great job, Liss!